Lesbian Dating: Falling in Love with Straight Girls

Today’s question was submitted by Dianna, who resides in Vermont. She writes, “I have a bad habit of falling for straight girls. I always find out after I’ve fallen in love. Does this mean I’m going for women who are unavailable to me? How can I fix this?”

[music] Well Dianna, the first question that comes to mind is…
How are you falling in love with straight girls? How is it that you’re falling in love with somebody that you don’t know is straight?

So I’m wondering if you’re not asking the right questions early on, or that you’re not asking questions period early on. And you just following with your heart?

The important thing here is that you wanna be with somebody who you can feel safe with, right? Somebody who knows who they are, who knows their sexual orientation and if they’re not comfortable on their sexual orientation yet, at least they’re working towards being comfortable and there’s some insight and awareness at least they’re working towards an awareness around where they are themselves in their own sexual orientation and their OWN development around that.

So I’m concerned about the fact that you fall in love with somebody that, that you just don’t know if they’re gay or straight so… think about that please next time you go out there and you meet somebody that you’re into think about…. “Alright I need to ask this person questions about their past questions about their sexual orientation, questions about how they feel on their own skin…… ” That sort of thing.

So hopefully this is helpful and thanks for submitting a question. Good luck.

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