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Ask Dr. Frankie “Is she the one for me?”

Ask Dr. Frankie Relationship and Dating Tips for Lesbians – Lesbian Matchmaker http://www.littlegaybook.com

We have a question today from Kim who resides in Demoyne. She says, I’ve been in my lesbian relationship for three months and I’m wondering if she’s the one for me? It’s important to keep in mind, in the beginning of a relationship you’re feeling really excited, there’s Oxytocin and Serotonin that’s being secreted in your brain so it’s making you feel really really good and euphoric. It’s giving you that feeling of wanting to be with your girlfriend all the time. It’s important to recognize that there are some biological factors that are sort of impacting the way that you feel. So when you take that into consideration you really want to slow down and get to know your girlfriend before determining after three months that this person is the one for you, because at this point you really can’t know. There’s something else that actually happens that’s called projection, where we tend to project what we really want to have in a lesbian relationship, what we really want to see in our partners, such as certain qualities or characteristics, so we can actually project those things onto them when they don’t actually have them because we want so badly for them to have it that we almost pretend that it’s there. I want you to keep that in mind as well and take your time getting to know each other. Do you enjoy spending quality time together?, do you have good communication together?, do you have chemistry? Chemistry is really important. It’s important to not just have compatibility but to also feel like there’s chemistry because you want this energy to take you through many many years. So you want to feel very connected in that way and just be in the moment, don’t rush. Don’t rush into thinking about marriage. I would spend many more months together before you make a decision about whether she’s the one. So I hope this was helpful Kim. Good luck! For more advice on lesbian dating and lesbian relationships please contact Dr. Frankie.

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