Ask Dr. Frankie “How to break up and stay friends”

Today we have a question from Julie who resides in Tennessee. She writes in an says things aren’t working out in my relationship but I love and care for my girlfriend. How do I end my relationship without destroying the possibility of being friends in the future? Thank you Julie for submitting this question – it’s a good one. Most importantly this is someone you really love and care for so you really want to be open and honest and communicate with her about the way you feel. You don’t want to wait and stall. You want to tell her it’s not working out because the longer you drag it out the more painful and damaging it will be for you, her and the relationship as a whole. As soon as possible tell her how you feel from the heart, in a way that’s loving and caring. It’s important that she feels you’re being mindful and respectful of where she sits because it’s really hard to be the person being rejected which is not to say it’s not difficult being the rejector. Put yourself in her shoes and be empathetic and be willing to listen to her feelings and her thoughts about it. Good luck to you! It’s not an easy situation but I feel if you’re honest, open and loving I think it will be okay. In the future you’ll be about to be friends and maybe it will take some time which may mean that you don’t speak for a while. Good luck!

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