In some ways, it’s easier than ever to stay connected in a long-distance relationship. Between FaceTime, location tracking, and dozens of ways to text and video call, it’s possible to be in communication almost constantly.

But communication isn’t always the same as feeling truly connected, especially when you can’t curl up on the couch together or reach for your partner to comfort them after a long day. While almost nothing feels quite as good as waking up next to your partner in person, spending intentional quality time — a long-distance date night — can go a long way towards feeling genuinely connected. Here’s five ways to spend an evening with your long-distance date that will leave you feeling like the miles between you have fallen away.

1. Share a two-person book club

Watching movies or TV together is wonderful, and often the bread and butter of a long-distance (or local!) relationship. It’s lovely to spend a Friday night texting over a film, but there’s something more intimate about the process of reading a book together. It’s a longer time commitment, and almost feels like choosing to take on a project together. Taking turns selecting the titles is a way of sharing something about yourself with your partner: your favorite books from adolescence, a new topic you’ve been meaning to learn more about, or a genre you love.

For a shorter book, you might choose to literally read it together over the phone or video chat; it’s a sweet way to spend time together and share a piece of media, maybe right before bed. For a longer book, you can read separately, and enjoy thinking about your partner reading the same words in their own time far away. Set a date to discuss what you thought and share your insights on FaceTime, maybe over a glass of wine in the candlelight.

2. Read each other’s tarot cards or birth charts

If you’re a certain kind of person, you’ve been poring over your partner’s birth chart since you first met them — and even if we’re not, we all love learning new insights about our partners and discussing our own quirks with them. Schedule an evening to spend a few hours researching each others’ birth charts online together, comparing notes about what rings true and what doesn’t. If you’re feeling bold, you can even look up your astrological compatibility.

If astrology isn’t your thing, you can spend under $20 on a deck of tarot cards for a similar result — whether you believe in the fortunes you receive or not, spending a few hours taking turns asking questions and interpreting the answers helps you feel closer by doing a shared activity. And who knows, maybe you’ll find something unexpectedly resonant!

3. Powerpoint party

Whether it’s because of the pandemic or just a trend among young people, Powerpoint parties seem to be here to stay — and they’re a perfect activity for long-distance lovers who are connecting over video already.

The basic premise is simple: put together a presentation on the topic of your choice and perform it for your partner over Zoom or another video app — and maybe it’s a little flip or tongue-in-cheek. Of course, the topic you choose to present on makes a big difference here: ideally it’s something that genuinely lets your partner get to know you better, but is also fun and entertaining for both of you to spend time talking about. Some examples might include:

• A series of your most controversial hot takes
• Why your favorite bad movie is the best/worst of all time
• Pitching your partner on a low-stakes conspiracy theory
• Why your work nemesis is so terrible
• What you get right and everyone else gets wrong about your favorite topic/interest/hobby

Especially if you and your partner have always been long distance (or will be for a long time), it can be helpful to use this format to fill in some of the lived knowledge that can be hard to come by when you don’t share a day to day in the same place: pictures of all your IRL friends and what they do for work; a photo tour of your daily routine in your city; a detailed mapping of the web of friendship, romance and drama in your rock climbing club.

4. Art night

As many of us try to reconnect with our sense of play, drawing and coloring — like we used to do as kids — has renewed appeal. Whether your medium is cheap watercolors or a big box of crayons, set up a video call and spend a few hours with a glass of wine drawing pictures with your sweetie.

The point isn’t for them to turn out as fine art — though maybe they will! — but to have fun. Choose a theme to explore together: flowers, pets, or copying your favorite pieces of existing art. Or, if you’re feeling brave enough, try painting portraits of each other (or of your favorite photo of yourselves together). When you visit each other in person, seeing the art you made together on the walls will feel like a sweet reminder of all the effort you’ve put into staying connected.

5. Trade fantasies

Without question one of the hardest parts of being long-distance is the inability to touch, hold and have sex with your partner. Most of us in this situation are flexing our sexting muscles, which can certainly go a long way. If you’re having trouble getting started, or looking to spice up the intimate parts of your long-distance relationship, set aside a dedicated time to talk about what you’re into and share specific fantasies your partner may not have heard before.

If it’s helpful, you can do a yes/no/maybe list ahead of time and have a jumping off point for what you want to talk about. Talk over the phone instead of on video if that feels more intimate or less anxiety-inducing, or even trade emails or texts. Invite your partner (and yourself) to talk about what you find hot in your favorite scenarios, and let yourselves imagine what it might look like for you to embody your fantasies — then enjoy where the conversation takes you.

Recommended Books:

Together Apart: A Survival Guide for Navigating Long-Distance Relationships

Long-Distance Relationship Coloring Book: A Cute Love Gift For Couples With 26 Relaxing And Stress Relieving Designs

A Year of Us: A Couple’s Journal: One Question a Day to Spark Fun and Meaningful Conversations (Question a Day Couple’s Journal)

For More Articles Check Out These Recent Posts:

Should You Move for Your Long-Distance Partner?

Staying Connected in a Long-Distance Relationship

How to Make a Long Distance Relationship Work

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