Survey Results: I’ve Been In Your Database, But You’ve Never Called Me & I’ve Never Gone on A Date

In February, I asked you to answer my survey about the variety of content that I put out. Over 150 women responded, and one common question emerged:

“I’m in your lesbian matchmaking database, but I’ve never been called for a date and I don’t really see the value of being in the database.”

I’m SO GLAD you asked.

I started matchmaking after 10 years of supporting the gay/lesbian community as a psychologist, realizing I have a real talent for connecting people. Listening to a woman’s story and discerning how to best match her is my sweet spot.

Matchmaking is not affordable or appropriate for everyone.

It requires a considerable investment in time, money and energy. It’s a very intimate, individualized service and not everyone is a good candidate.

Creating the Matchmaking Database is a way for me to offer the option to more women who might not be able to invest in full matchmaking.

It gives me a “pool” of women to search for a match for my clients, as well as way for a woman to privately “put herself out there.”  I don’t match free members WITHIN the database, I only use it to find matches for my current matchmaking clients.

The Matchmaking Database is not a Dating Service

If you add yourself to the database and never get a call from me, it means I haven’t had a matchmaking client who is a good fit for you – I think that’s a good thing! I’d rather call you once with a good match, then five times with a bad match (wouldn’t you?).

Like life, there are no guarantees.

While I have an over 80% success rate in matching couples that stay together over three months, I make no guarantees that you’ll find “the one.” I offer an intensive service whereby I search, on your behalf, for a woman who matches what you are looking for a in a mate. If I find a possibility, I introduce the two of you and then get your feedback at the end of the date.


On a daily basis, I get more and more women creating profiles and adding themselves to the database. Staying in the database is completely voluntary and you’re always welcome to send us an email with a request to delete your profile.

I’m forever grateful to be doing this work and I’m always open to feedback. Take care.

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