fbpx

Everything You Need to Know About Buying a Dildo

You don’t need to be penetrated to have sex, and if you are into penetration, it doesn’t need to be with a phallus of any kind — yet for many of us, it’s what we prefer. Whether you call it a strap, dick, or dildo, whether it’s part of a gender-affirming sexual experience or not, whether you’re using it for vaginal penetration, anal, pegging, or something else, many of us find using a dildo during sex or masturbation hot, pleasurable, and fulfilling — it may even be our preferred or primary sex act.

Curious about whether this could be you? There’s never been a better time to find out — in today’s market, there’s a wide range of different options for sexy, accessible and even affordable dildos. Here’s where to start.

Do you want to use this in a harness, outside of one, or both?

2024-06-11 Blog Image 2

When you imagine using your ideal dildo, what’s happening in the scene? Are you holding it in your hands as you masturbate? Are you having sex with a partner in missionary? Securing the dildo to a floor or wall for someone to use it hands-free? Thinking about how you want to use your new toy helps you understand what characteristics and features you need it to have. 

If you want to use your dildo as a strap-on with any kind of harness, either worn by yourself or a partner, it’s important that the dildo have some kind of wide base so it can remain stable inside the harness, like this Acute from Tantus or the Amor. Some dildo bases can also double as a suction cup, which allows you to secure them to the floor, window, shower door, or other smooth surface, like the Kendall.

Some dildos aren’t harness-compatible, but are still a great option if you’re planning to use the toy with your hands. This includes dildos designed primarily for handling, like the Tantus G-Force, and any glass or stainless steel dildos, which can have a really pleasing sensation and weight as well as being ideal for temperature play.

Do you want to use your dildo for vaginal penetration, anal penetration, or both?

2024-06-11 Blog Image 3

When you think about yourself or a partner interacting with the dildo, how is it being used? Many dildos are multi-purpose, but especially if you’re looking forward to anal play, some might have an advantage over others.

Dildos intended mostly for vaginal play can be a variety of lengths, girths, and textures — an “average” size that works for many people might be something like 6″ in length and about 1.5″ in girth, like New York Toy Collective’s Shilo. “Dual density” dildos are also popular for vaginal play, offering a fairly realistic sensation — the Mustang is a popular example.

Alternatively, for anal play, people often find a firmer texture and more rigid dildo is helpful, like the Tantus Compact. You may also want a dildo that’s slightly smaller in length and girth, and if you’re having sex with someone with a prostate, an upward curve can feel great, like you see in the Tantus Silk or Sport.

What do you like for length and girth?

2024-06-11 Blog Image 4

The size — both length and girth — of a dildo is an incredibly personal decision. For some people, a little goes a long way; for others, they crave a feeling of fullness. 

For the former group, something approachable like the Temptasia Twist or Gender Fluid Enthrall might be a good fit, with a girth topping out around 1 inch and an insertable length of about 5 inches. 

On the other end of the spectrum, for people looking to go big or go home, the Vixskin Buck is a great option for someone looking for a lot of girth, and the Tantus General has a lot to offer in terms of both length and girth.

If you’re using a dildo to have sex with a range of other partners, or want a go-to that’s a good option no matter who you have sex with in the future, it may be best to invest in something sort of middle-of-the-road in terms of length, girth, and density — I recommend both the Pleasure Works Siren and the Fun Factory Magnum as general-purpose dildo options, with the Magnum being a little firmer than the Siren.

Is it important that your dildo be realistic?

2024-06-11 Blog Image 5

For some people, the ideal dildo is one that looks like it could be part of your body; for others, they’d much prefer it be clearly visually different than a human penis. 

When it comes to realistic dildos, the Vixskin line is very popular, as is the Tantus Mark. The New York Toy Collective’s Shilo is a “pack n’ play” toy, flexible enough that it can be worn throughout the day under your clothes as a packer while also being firm enough to use for play.

The world of unrealistic dildos is full of intriguing shapes, colors and sensations. Toys like the Pixie offer beautiful colorways, and Blush’s Avant line offers a range of shapes for different kinds of stimulation, like the Sun’s Out and Opal Dreams. Tantus’ Flurry and Cush offer lots of girth and fullness along with a beautiful pastel colorway and dual density texture. Non-realistic dildos can also offer a range of fun textures and sensations with ridges and patterns that you don’t see in more realistic dildos, like the Charmer or Tsunami.

Do you want your dildo to vibrate or include other bells or whistles?

2024-06-11 Blog Image 6

Not all dildos are created equal. If penetration is the main event for you, maybe you’d like to make it even better with a vibrating insertable toy like the Lennox or Luxe. If you like having strap-on sex with a harness but wish it was even more enjoyable and intimate for both parties, you may be interested in a double-ended or strapless dildo, like the Tantus Strapless or the Strap-on-Me. And if all of the above sounds good for you, something like the Happy Rabbit Vibrating Strapless may make all your wildest dreams come true, “designed so couples can experience mutual and varied stimulation.”

For More Articles Check Out These Recent Posts:

Everything You Need to Know About Buying a Vibrator

Everything You Need to Know About the G-Spot

The Basic of Safer Sex for Lesbian, Queer and Trans Folks


Affiliate Disclaimer: Little Gay Book may earn commissions from qualifying purchases made through links on our website. These commissions help to support our work in providing valuable content to our readers. Rest assured, this does not affect the price you pay for any products or services. We only recommend products that we genuinely believe will bring value to our audience. Thank you for your support!

Take the Butch-Femme Quiz

take the Butch
Femme
Quiz

Quiz me!